Scattershooting on a Sunday: Boxberger tops . . . Will you pay for Phil vs. Tiger? . . . Regina has had quite a year

Scattershooting

“When I heard the Leafs had signed Hayley Wickenheiser,” writes Cam Hutchinson of the Saskatoon Express, “my first thought was, ‘She doesn’t play defence, does she?’ ”


No, I’m not a fan of MLB’s players’ weekend in which players are outfitted in (in some cases) horrid-looking uniforms and allowed to put nicknames on the namebars. But Arizona Diamondbacks reliever Brad Boxberger gets full marks for having fun with it.


“Semi-retired Chris Berman could return to ESPN in a reduced role on ‘SportsCenter’ and NFL-related programming, the New York Post reported,” writes Dwight Perry of the Seattle Times. “In other words, Berman might be . . . nah, too easy.”


RJ Currie of SportsDeke.com had this take: “Chris Berman reportedly may return to ESPN, but only in a reduced role. So he . . . won’t . . . go . . . all . . . the . . . way!”


Perry, again: “Corey Bellemore, winner of this year’s Beer Mile World Classic in Vancouver, B.C., was disqualified when race officials ruled he didn’t consume enough beer during the race’s four mandatory brew stops. It’s believed to be the first time in sports history in which a runner was stripped of his title for failing to fail a drug test.”



One more from Currie: “A golfer reportedly had a finger bitten off at the knuckle in a fight at a Massachusetts club. You can read about it in Golf Digits — er — Digest.”


I can agree with Steve Simmons of the Toronto Sun on these items from his Sunday column: “Is there anything more ridiculous than the French Open banning Serena Williams’ tennis outfit? . . . Might be in the minority on this, but I wouldn’t pay 10 cents to watch Tiger Woods play Phil Mickelson head-to-head on pay-per-view.”


I have a feeling Simmons would agree with me when I say that there is something wrong about junior hockey teams playing games in August.


After Puerto Rico beat Canada, 9-4, eliminating the team from Whalley, B.C., at the Little League World Series, Vancouver comedian Torben Rolfsen noted: “Donald Trump said, ‘See, I told you Puerto Rico had power.’ ”



After Carmelo Anthony signed a one-year contract with the Houston Rockets, Janice Hough (aka The Left Coast Sports Babe) wrote: “This is great news for the Warriors, Lakers and Spurs.”


One more from Hough, who is at LeftCoastSportsBabe.com: “Due to rule technicalities, Robinson Cano, returning from a 90-game PED suspension, is ineligible for any playoff games, while  Roberto Osuna, returning from a  75-game domestic violence suspension, is eligible. If Cano had only beaten his girlfriend instead of taking PEDs he could play in the postseason. Is this really how MLB wants to compete with the NFL?”


After Caesar’s Palace Sports Book in Vegas revealed that it had taken more bets on the Cleveland Browns to win the AFC North than the other three division teams combined, Hough commented: “Beam me up, Scotty.”




Over the past four-plus years, former NBA star Kobe Bryant has invested US$6 million in BodyArmor, the producer of a sports drink. Sources have told ESPN that Bryant’s investment now is worth about US$200 million. . . . And how are your investments doing these days?


Receiver Josh Gordon of the Cleveland Browns has missed 56 of 96 NFL games, mainly due to drug-related suspensions. As old friend Jack Finarelli, who can be found at SportsCurmudgeon.com, noted: “To say that Gordon has had an ‘unorthodox career’ to date would be akin to saying that Frank Sinatra ‘could sing a little.’ ”


I will assume that you are familiar with the look on the face of New England Patriots head coach Bill Belichick prior to the postgame interview. Here’s Scott Ostler of the San Francisco Chronicle describing it: “The dude at your gym waiting impatiently for you to get your wimpy ass off the bench-press machine.”


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It seems I got my minor midget and major midget Thompson Blazers hockey teams mixed up in this space on Saturday night. . . . The minor midget Blazers are a first-year team and will have Neil Pilon and Darryl Sydor on board as assistant coaches, alongside head coach Chris Murray, who is a former WHL/NHL skater. . . . Meanwhile, Carter Cochrane is the first-year head coach of the major midget Blazers. Mitchell Barker has returned as an assistant coach and is joined by James Friedel and Devin Gannon. . . . Apologies to all involved for the confusion.


The Moose Jaw Warriors played their annual Black-White game on Sunday at Mosaic Place to bring an end to their training camp. A tip of the fedora to the Warriors for keeping alive the memory of Ethan Brown.

If you aren’t aware of Ethan Williams, you should click right here.


Dorothy, my wife of 46 years, will celebrate the fifth anniversary of her kidney transplant by taking part in the 2018 Kamloops Kidney Walk. If you would like to support her with a donation, you are able to do so right here.


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Scattershooting on a Sunday: No welcome back Carter . . . Kamloops adds a scout . . . DD Train is rolling now


Scattershooting

Here’s Scott Ostler of the San Francisco Chronicle: “Former NFL running back Ricky Williams, who once took a break from smoking weed to swear to me that he was done smoking weed, is selling his own line of weed products, ‘Real Wellness by Ricky Williams.’  I hope it’s better than the line of baloney he used to sell.”


On the subject of weed and footballers, you don’t suppose the Saskatchewan Roughriders released Duron Carter because he had become too much of a distraction, do you? That being the case, the move should have been made weeks, if not months, ago.

Carter received an absolute discharge on June 21 in Winnipeg after pleading guilty to possession of marijuana-laced cookies — they also featured chocolate chips — following his arrest at the Winnipeg James Armstrong Richardson International Airport on Nov. 25 in November.

He also has pleaded not guilty to another possession charge, this one stemming from an arrest at Saskatoon’s John G. Diefenbaker International Airport on Feb. 1. That case is scheduled to go to trial on Dec. 3.

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For any football fans expecting an honest explanation from the brass as to why the Roughriders dumped Carter, well, forget it. Chris Jones is the top dog there — actually, he is the vice-president of football operations, general manager, head coach and defensive co-ordinator — and the team’s playbook carries the title ‘My Way or the Highway.’ Jones also isn’t alone in footballdom in operating under a cone of silence. I mean, are you still expecting New England Patriots head coach Bill Belichick to explain why he didn’t use defensive back Malcolm Butler in Super Bowl LII?

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If you’re interested in an overview of the situation involving the Roughriders and Carter, Ian Hamilton, the senior reporter at riderville.com, has a good look right here.


The Kamloops Blazers have added Jason Pashelka to their scouting staff. Pashelka, from Kamloops1Calgary, spent 11 seasons scouting with the Portland Winterhawks, so has a connection to Matt Bardsley, the Blazers’ new general manager. Bardsley had been in the Winterhawks’ organization since 1999 before signing on with the Blazers. . . . Pashelka spent the past two seasons scouting southern Alberta for the Moose Jaw Warriors. . . . Earlier, the Blazers lost scout Mark Blair, who left after 11 seasons with them. He since has joined the scouting staff in Moose Jaw.


“Estaban Loaiza, who made over $40 million as a Major League pitcher, faces life in prison for attempting to sell $500,000 in cocaine near a San Diego school,” tweets comedy writer Alex Kaseberg. “Experts say this is the stupidest thing attempted since IHOP changed its name to International House of Burgers.”

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Kaseberg, again: “In Florida, a police helicopter filmed a fleeing woman who stole a car being herded by cows toward the police. Authorities do not consider this a full-blown Florida incident as she was not carrying an alligator under her arm at the time.”


The Kamloops Broncos dropped a 42-0 decision to the Vancouver Island Raiders in a junior football game played in Nanaimo on Saturday night. Judging from the above tweet, the Broncos had some issues with their punting game.


The Las Vegas Aces, a team in the WNBA, spent 24 hours en route to Washington, D.C., for a recent game with the Mystics. When they didn’t arrive in Washington until five hours before the scheduled game time, they chose not to play “for health and safety reasons.” . . . Seriously. . . . Under similar circumstances, how many junior hockey games wouldn’t get played over the course of a season? . . . The WNBA later forfeited that game to the Mystics.



“The Dallas Cowboys welcomed Randy Gregory to camp after he had been suspended by the NFL for a year due to substance abuse violations,” notes Jack Finarelli, aka The Sports Curmudgeon. “This is merely the latest in a series of suspensions for the same reason. A couple of weeks ago, Jerry Jones said without any modifiers that if one of the Cowboys did not stand on the sidelines for the national anthem, that player would not play for the Cowboys. So, a serial drug abuser is OK, but . . .”


Brian Elder is the new head scout for the MJHL’s Virden Oil Capitals. Elder, who played three seasons (1994-97 ) tending goal with the Brandon Wheat Kings, lives and teaches school in Souris, Man. He spent the previous four seasons as a scout with the Oil Capitals. . . . Jamie Hodson, the Oil Capitals’ director of business and hockey operations, also is a former Wheat Kings goaltender (1997-2001).


The DD Train has started to roll. Dorothy, my wife of 46 years, had a kidney transplant on Sept. 23, 2013. This year, on Sept. 23, she will take part in her fifth straight Kamloops Kidney Walk. If you would like to support her with a donation, you may do so right here. As of last night, she was among the top-10 fundraisers in B.C. Yes, we are rather proud of her in these parts.


“Give Trump credit,” writes Janice Hough (leftcoastsportsbabe.com). “Before this year, almost nobody cared what the SCORES were for preseason football, let alone what players were doing during the anthem.”

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Hough, again: “The San Francisco 49ers now say there isn’t anything they can do about the intense sun and heat faced by fans on the east side of Levi’s Stadium. But they will lower the price of bottled water from $6 to $2 so fans can stay hydrated. That’s the NFL equivalent of ‘thoughts and prayers’.”


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Scattershooting on Sunday: Here’s to Manitoba . . . Carter and Owens together? Here’s hoping . . . U of Lethbridge has an opening

Scattershooting

Here’s a reminder that Manitoba got it right: The first Monday in August is Terry Fox Day, as it should be, but isn’t, everywhere in Canada.


Headline at BorowitzReport.com: Trump demands that NFL players stand during Russian national anthem.


If you were to look up stubborn in a dictionary, you just might find a picture of a football coach. No one with any power in the sporting world is more stubborn than a man in that position. However, I think it’s safe to say that Chris Jones, who is the vice-president of football operations, general manager and head coach with the Saskatchewan Roughriders, has raised that bar even higher.

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ICYMI, Jones worked out former NFL receiver Terrell Owens on Sunday in South Pittsburg, Tenn. Here’s hoping that the Roughriders, who are on a bye week, sign Owens, if only for the entertainment that would be provided by having Owens and Duron Carter on the field at the same time.

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A question: Is Regina big enough for Carter and Owens at the same time? . . . Is Saskatchewan?


“San Francisco Giants first baseman Brandon Belt and his wife named their newborn son August, in honor of Brandon’s college coach at Texas, the late Augie Garrido,” writes Dwight Perry of the SeattleTimes. “Just be thankful the Longhorns hired Garrido instead of Oil Can Boyd.”



If you spend much time watching the New York Yankees, you also spend a lot of time asking yourself: “How is it that the Yankees jettisoned Joe Girardi and then ended up with Aaron Boone?”


While musing about attempts by Chinese basketball teams to sign aging NBAers, Jack Finarelli, aka The Sports Curmudgeon, writes: “The reigning champions of the Chinese Basketball Association are the Liaoning Flying Leopards.  Liaoning is the Chinese province that borders North Korea; I have never been there; and if they have flying leopards there, I do not think I would want to visit.”


“What’s better?” asks Scott Ostler of the San Francisco Chronicle. “To be through the roof or off the charts? Off the grid or under the radar? Underrated or overserved? Over-exposed or half-baked?”

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Here’s Ostler, again: “If you’re wondering: Yes, it is a law that every sports interview be conducted in front of ‘wallpaper,’ those huge backdrops with a rep pattern of the team logo and a key sponsor. And, yes, a wallpaper backdrop can cause hypnotic trance. And, yes, when a coach or manager gets home and his wife asks how his day went, before answering he hauls out a wallpaper.”


“It’s staggering how much airtime TSN and ESPN devoted to Tiger Woods not winning the British Open,” notes RJ Currie of SportsDeke.com. “As for the actual winner, what’s the Italian term for chopped liver?”

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Currie again: “Toronto dealt veteran southpaw JA Happ to the Yankees. Which makes the Jays even more Happ-less.”


Two of ESPN’s baseball crews feature three voices in the booth — Jon (Boog) Sciambi with David Ross and Rick Sutcliffe, and Matt Vasgersian with Jessica Mendoza and Alex Rodriguez. I can guarantee that no one involved with either crew has ever heard Simon and Garfunkel’s hit ‘The Sounds of Silence’ or The Tremeloes’ ‘Silence is Golden.’


After quarterback Johnny Manziel was traded by the Hamilton Tiger-Cats to the Alouettes, Janice Hough, aka The Left Coast Sports Babe, wrote: “And we thought poutine was Montreal’s biggest hot mess.”


It recently was National Intern Day in the U.S., which caused Hough to note: “I miss the days when that would have been the No. 1 source of jokes about a current U.S. president.”


Your good read for today has Robert Klemko of si.com writing about the bubble in which former NFL linebacker Ray Lewis was placed, something that has allowed him to avoid dealing publicly with a particularly nasty incident from his past. It’s all right here and this is really, really good stuff.


MacBeth

F Tyler Fiddler (Calgary, 2007-11) signed a one-year contract with Rungsted (Denmark, Metal Ligaen). Last season, he had 13 goals and 25 assists in 48 games with SønderjyskE Vojens (Denmark, Metal Ligaen). . . .

F Brody Sutter (Saskatoon, Lethbridge, 2008-12) signed a one-year contract with Sport Vaasa (Finland, Liiga). Last season, he had eight goals and 10 assists in 58 games with the Manitoba Moose (AHL). . . .

F Dwight King (Lethbridge, 2004-09) signed a one-year contract with the Graz 99ers (Austria, Erste Bank Liga). Last season, he had six goals and eight assists in 49 games with Avtomobilist Yekaterinburg (Russia, KHL). . . .

F Michal Šiška (Kamloops, 2008-09) signed one-year contract with Olofström (Sweden, Division 2). Last season, he was pointless in two games with Nové Zámky B (Slovakia, 1, Liga), and had three goals and eight assists in 15 games with Topoľčany (Slovakia, 1. Liga).


ThisThat

Head coach Spiros Anastas is leaving the U of Lethbridge after four seasons as the head coach of the Pronghorns. According to a news release from the athletic department, Anastas “tendered his resignation to pursue another coaching opportunity.” . . . The Pronghorns were 36-68-8 under Anastas. The Pronghorns are to be the host team for the Canadian university men’s championship in 2019 for the first time in the program’s history. . . . Anastas had joined the Pronghorns after working as an assistant coach with the Grand Rapids Griffins, the AHL affiliate of the NHL’s Detroit Red Wings.



Dorothy, my wife of 46 years, underwent a kidney transplant on Sept. 23, 2013. She will celebrate the fifth anniversary on Sept. 23 by taking part in the Kamloops Kidney Walk. This will be the fifth time she has done the Kidney Walk; she has been the leading fund-raiser in Kamloops in each of the previous four years. . . . If you would like to support her this year, you are able to do so right here.


The Everett Silvertips and hockey fans in the Pacific Northwest have been fortunate over the last while as the Everett Herald had Nick Patterson and then Jesse Geleynse on the beat, While Patterson remains on staff as sports columnist, Geleynse is on the move. Perhaps he’ll end up on the Penguins beat.


F Patrick D’Amico is returning for a second go-round with the ECHL’s Norfolk Admirals. . . . D’Amico, 23, is from Winnipeg. He played 160 WHL games over three seasons (2012-15) with the Regina Pats, putting up 27 goals and 48 assists. . . . Last season, he had two goals and an assist in 10 games with the ECHL’s Atlanta Gladiators, then added 10 goals and 23 assists in 55 games with Norfolk. He also has played in the ECHL with the Colorado Eagles, Atlanta Gladiators and Indy Fuel.


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Scattershooting on a Sunday . . . Warriors get a Harley . . . Get outta here, Buck . . . Froot Loops on a hot dog


Scattershooting

I haven’t yet watched Sunday’s heats from the Rangeland Derby at the Calgary Stampede, so don’t know how Calgary Hitmen scout Chad Harden did. But he won his heat on Saturday night. Wes Gilbertson of Postmedia has more on Harden right here.


There are seven Sportsnet channels on my satellite TV package. On Wednesday, four of those channels started showing the MLB game between the Boston Red Sox and the host Washington Nationals at 8 a.m. Pacific (11 a.m. ET). Meanwhile, the visiting New York Yankees and Atlanta Braves, two of the best young teams in MLB, were to begin at 10 a.m. PT (1:05 p.m. ET) and Sportsnet had that game scheduled for the same four channels. . . . By the time the Braves and Yankees got on those channels, the Bronx Bombers had a 5-0 lead. You would think that maybe, just maybe, the Braves-Yankees game could have been shown in its entirety on one of those channels. . . . You just wonder if Sportsnet does things like this on purpose, you know, just to upset viewers.


Dwight Perry of the Seattle Times wonders . . . The biggest competitive mismatch these days is: (a) Globetrotters vs. Generals; (b) Warriors vs. NBA; (c) Joey Chestnut vs. hot dogs?


After the Golden State Warriors signed free-agent centre DeMarcus (Boogie) Cousins, who is all-star calibre, Scott Ostler of the San Francisco Chronicle noted: “It’s like you ask Santa for a bike, and he brings you a Harley.”


Hey, TSN, I think we can do with fewer shots of beer-swilling fans during your CFL telecasts. I would suggest that it was completely out of hand during Thursday’s game from Pilsner-land (aka Regina).


If Brendan Shanahan wants a shot at the Stanley Cup immediately,” writes Cam Hutchinson of the Saskatoon Express, “he should trade John Tavares to Ottawa for Erik Karlsson.”


If auto-correct had half a brain it would correct your spelling mistakes, instead of taking words that you spell correctly and changing them.


Headline at Fark.com: 29 NBA teams to change their name to the Washington Generals in 2019.


Jack Finarelli, over at sportscurmudgeon.com, had a tasty note the other day: “In Cleveland at Progressive Field, fans attending Indians’ games can order a Slider Dog. That would be a hot dog topped with mac and cheese, bacon and Froot Loops. Seriously . . .”


I don’t know what is more hilarious . . . Buck Martinez, the lead cheerleader on most Toronto Blue Jays telecasts, screaming “Get outta here ball” as one dies on the warning track, or hollering “Get outta here ball” with his favourite team trailing 8-4 with two out in the bottom of the ninth inning.


“I was just watching Terminator 2 where the T-1000 becomes so brittle that part of his body breaks with each movement,” reports RJ Currie of SportsDeke.com. “Anyone else just think of Milos Raonic?”


Currie, again: “God’s truth, I’ve just watched 11 minutes of TSN without any mention of John Tavares. So I must — ooops; they didn’t make it to 12 minutes.”


One more from Currie: “So far, Cavaliers Game 1 goat J.R. Smith hasn’t gone into witness protection. And if he did, what would his last name be?”