WHL scout pens Christmas tune . . . and it’s right here!

MikeFraser
Mike Fraser, with the Ed Chynoweth Cup.

Mike Fraser, a veteran WHL scout who beats the bushes on behalf of the Brandon Wheat Kings, is big on Christmas. Here is his work for Christmas 2017, most of which likely was written during intermissions of bantam hockey games in the Edmonton area. . . .


Okay folks. After two years of ‘A Scout’s Night Before Christmas,’ both versions have been officially retired. So, in honour of the Christmas song that you hear 468 times a day during the holiday season — ‘All I Want for Christmas is You,’ by Mariah Carey — I give you: ‘All a Scout Wants for Christmas,’ a parody of Mariah’s classic. The only rule: You must sing it in the melody of Mariah’s version. And who are you kidding . . . you know the melody so don’t even pretend you don’t . . .

🎄ALL A SCOUT WANTS FOR CHRISTMAS🏒

I don’t want a lot for Christmas,
There is just one thing I need:
For all those rinks to turn the heat on
My hands and feet are both freezing.
I see those heaters up above,
Always turned off — never showing any love.
Make my wish come true,
Because all of my limbs are turning blue.

If Santa can’t turn on the heat this Christmas,
In those rinks we desperately need,
Then let’s get rid of annoying parents,
The ones that make both my ears bleed.
No one needs to hear their nonsense,
Especially kids living the dream.
They scream and yell and are never happy,
Even if their kid is best on the team.

Kids learn so much on their own,
Ridiculous parents make me groan,
Hockey’s fun that’s true,
So buddy don’t ruin it by making it about you.

I won’t ask for much this Christmas
But safety and health on those bad roads.
Bitter rink coffee is waiting,
And expect more than a few man-colds.

I will make a list and send it,
And think about our first-round pick,
Some nights I just stay awake,
And ponder which player we’ll take.

I wish the draft were here tonight,
But it’s a long season and that’s all right,
There’s lots yet still to do,
I won’t get time off until June.

Oh the goal light is shining,
A real bright red glare.
And the sound of kids cheering,
While lifting their sticks in the air.

And all the scouts are writing,
In their notebooks or even typing,
Santa won’t you bring,
That player we really need,
Won’t you please have him put on our jersey.

I don’t want a lot for Christmas,
All that I am asking for,
Another playoff run oh baby,
Like 2016 and not before.

But not just truly for my own,
For all our busy staff I know,
No matter how we do,
Baby I’ll be at the rink, how ‘bout you?

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